• advice • from • a • shaykh’s • wife •

All praise is for Allah, and may peace and blessings be upon the Messenger of Allah (sallalahu alayhi wasalaam), and upon (the Messenger’s) family and companions.

As salaamu alaykunna,

Inshaa`Allah this email reaches all of you in the best of health and in a high state of eeman.  Umm Abdil Wahhab has been married to Sheikh Hassan Al-Banna (hafithuallah) for 25 years. She is 67 years old and has 1 son.  She is a wonderful woman, very warm, genuine and friendly.  I truly miss her and was saddened by their departure.    Alhumdulilah, we had an opportunity to speak with her and she shared some (what I call) pearls of wisdom.  She told us that the Sheikh does all of the shopping for their house and for her.  She was rather puzzled at the fact that women in the states go shopping.  She said she has never seen this in Islam.  She asked why the men do not go, when she was told the men work, she said in a matter of fact tone – ok since they work during the week, they can go shopping on Saturday and Sunday.  When asked what piece of advice would she give to the women in the states, she said first and foremost LEARN ARABIC. She said she was saddened that there were not more sisters in the states that speak Arabic.  She said she doesn’t understand why we learn (and teach our children) Quran before we learn to read, write and understand Arabic.  She said she thought that was backwards, as how can we truly understand Quran, if we do not understand Arabic.  Without the true understanding, it is just memorization and this is not enough.  She said our first priority should be learning Arabic, and then teaching our children.  She said we should speak Arabic in our homes and to each other as much as possible.  She said our children should be making salat at the age of 7 and we should beat them with miswak (for not making it) at 10. On Friday, at the Masjid, after salatul Maghrib, she asked why the sisters do not make the sunnah prayers.  She stressed that the sunnah prayers were muakkada (highly stressed) and she asked that this be conveyed to all the sisters.  She expressed concern about the women in the states and the number of marriages and divorces.  She said she saw so many women crying over the marriages and this made her sad.  She talked about how women spoke to her about divorcing and being remarried within a few months.  She said she did not understand how and why this happened and that this upset her as well.  She said the men are responsible for 3 things (housing, clothing and food – period).  She mentioned the murder of Brother Siddiq and she said that women must submit to the deen completely.  Polygyny is part of Islam and if the husband wants to exercise this right the women must submit.  She talked about sisterhood and ramadan coming, and she said the families should be getting together throughout the month of ramadan and beyond.  She said we should be visiting one another, sharing meals, bringing food to each others homes and enjoying each others company.  She also talked about the way the women dress (kuffar) in the states.  She said it was so bad that she had to cover her eyes.  She spoke of several other things as well, mashaa`Allah.  My dear sisters, this last thing I am going to write literally brought tears to all of our eyes when she said it and it is something that we should all reflect on…We asked Umm Abdil-Wahhaab how she felt about her visit to the states (this was upon her arrival and before she had an opportunity to go to the Masjid in Philly) she said “the Salafiyoon in the States is all talk no deen, all talk no religion” – My dear sisters, on that note, I will close.

I pray that I have presented this wonderful woman’s words accurately.  I ask Allah subhanu wa ta al`aa to forgive me for anything that I have stated incorrectly.  Inshaa`Allah her words will serve as a reminder for us all and may Allah bless her and the Sheikh in this life and in the next. Ameen.

Wasalaamu Alaikum wa Rahmatuallah wa maghfiratuhu

Allahumma-ghfir li dhanbi kullahu, diqqahu wa jillahu, wa awwalahu wa akhirahu wa ala niyatahu wa sirrahu. (O Allah, forgive me all my sins great and small, first and last, those that are apparent and those that are hidden).


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